So I know I promised to blog about the move, that one is still coming however I found something tonight that I felt needed to be shared.
It all starts with a sweet baby giraffe toy that looks similar to this one.
From the second we said I do, we got asked when we wanted kids and given plenty of advice on when we should have one... Whether this advice was wanted or not (more on the latter side) we were told we should wait or not wait, how long and just way too much TMI information. We knew that we really wanted to have kids young. We wanted to be the fun parents, able to be involved and play on the playground. Be young when our kids go to college, have babies of their own and almost more so... We wanted to be young when they they left so that we could have a lot of young time together. Maybe sounds silly but we really wanted to be able to enjoy each moment and not just be the parent in an easy chair. Maybe this stems partially from the fact that my grandparents are almost 90 and I never really had any of that with them... Who knows. All we knew is that it's what we really desired. Add onto that fact that we both like kids and it was really a no brainer.
Joe came back from deployment in August of '10 and we just put the baby in Gods hands. In truth we really were hoping the answer was sooner than later. As the months rolled on, I couldn't help getting concerned. I blossomed young and never had any female problems, always thought I'd be "fertile myrtle". We did have some concerns with Joe since he got shocked by about 1200 volts and was around a lot of radiation in the navy, we hoped though since the radiation had been off that things would be ok. More months rolled on and I got more and more emotional (although I always tried to make myself not) when I knew that I hadn't gotten pregnant yet. I remember tears just rolling down my cheeks saying, "God, I would love a baby. A baby would be so taken care of in this family. Why not me?".
A dear friend of our family found out she was pregnant in late fall before her husband deployed and while we couldn't be more excited for them, I still ached for that child. One day we were at target with them and saw a sweet little giraffe that was on the end cap marked down to just dollars. It plays a gentle melody and seemed perfect except for the fact that the belly seams were coming apart. Joe fell in love with it and said it would be for our kid, or maybe for our friend's but either way, "I could fix it right?". I said sure and brought it home and with hope for that one day stitched those seams up.
Months continued to roll by. We were almost at an accumulative year of no news. The sweet giraffe sat in our guest room closet where it would make me smile and tear up at the same time. We thought that we would start looking into adoption, especially since I always did love that idea anyway. Although the science is there, we never really wanted to go heavy into infertility treatment because we didn't want blame to get placed or hurt to happen between us.
Joe got the job and we just figured that maybe it was a good thing that I didn't have a newborn in my arms (or 9 months pregnant) as that would have made the move difficult... Anything to still remain optimistic but really in my heart of hearts I had given it up to God. He knew my heart and if that meant that some sweet orphan needed a home we could give it to him/her... Along with a giraffe.
The move came and went and one day in the car with Joe's mother, she sighed on the fact that she wouldn't have a grandchild in 2011, "Unless you're not telling me something..." We laughed about it but later on counted the days... Somehow in the move, we kind of, well forgot! The next morning I told Joe I wasn't moving from the bed until he got me a pregnancy test and so off to the pharmacy he marched... It wasn't the first I'd taken but hey, I was late! I came out of that restroom absolutely in tears and we both jumped up and down. God had given us our baby! I was overwhelmed.
I hadn't seen that giraffe again until tonight. I unpacked a box and it was sitting on top of everything. I got tears in my eyes. We're going to have a baby to give that giraffe to after all. God just needed to teach me a little lesson about patience and hope, trust and love. At least thats how I see it... Maybe he has some more ideas up his sleeve for me. I'm ready for that though, he really has good plans for this family!