God is in control...A lesson in letting go. Part 2

After that one phone call question that seemingly changed everything, J and I began discussing our future. Where did we want to be in ten years? What type of people did we want to be? Where did we want to raise our family? How did we want to raise our family? These types of discussions led to another comment. I reminded my husband of a comment about his desire to be in law enforcement and asked if this was still the case. This was the beginning of our new direction. After months of preparing Joe's package to try to do the switch between enlisted and officer and a quick swift door closing in that direction, we were started on another long interview process.

We began thinking, where would we move? We do have have family's in the same state and I have never truly been able to call a place home. We both are not crazy about Virginia and I know my allergies will thank me for leaving so Virginia has never been a real option but rather a last resort. With the decision that we wanted our kids to be raised with grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins we knew that Texas or Montana were our first two places on the list. We talked about Montana where my parents are currently residing but how long would they remain there and how was the job market? Did we want to deal with the cold? (Joe had no problem with that last question, but I was a little iffy.) We then moved on to Texas. Did we want the heat? Yep, that was the only real question. All of Joe's immediate family lives within a 3 1/2 mile radius and the majority is within 30 minutes. The job market was good as there are so many different police departments. We also both love the city. So while Joe was still deployed he began the second interview packet. This interview packet included some very personal questions and a lot of digging... I caught myself thinking, man am I ready for this? This was a big change. No longer would I be able to ask: "Do you have a military discount?" (this may seem trivial but it just is a small part of the big military picture.) We would have to pack up, and move our two vehicles, two dogs and (multiplying) belongings over 1300 miles. We would have to find a place to live, I may have to find a new job.. and oh that thing called friends which are finally starting to happen. Yep- gotta leave them again.

In so many ways, it really is like starting all over again. Was I ready for this? Were we ready for this?

While visiting Joe's family in August, Joe delivered his huge (I believe it was like 60 pages) application to the Austin City Police Department. He scheduled his next interview (They go through 2 sets of interviews and then you have to go through the academy) for the first week of November. This interview consists of physical and mental exams. He will have to take a polygraph test! (I laugh at this from the psychology perspective... so not accurate!) We had to buy him a suit and a plane ticket and reserve a rental car. This is a big step! Not only are we trying to get out of the navy but we're putting hundreds of dollars into this interview process.

Can you say trust?

I started doubting and wondering and just being my little worry wort self. Along with this is the question that I think just about any married couple asks. The question of children. I work with kids all day long and as much as some people may think it is great birth control, I just wish I got all the happy moments too.. I get the tears and the naps and the lunch time meal but I don't get the cuddles in the evening and all the laughter and happiness. I can't wait to have that myself. Now that we're married and in a different place in our life I find that we are around a lot of couples with kids. J has gotten the opportunity to hang out with children and see what a blessing they are. We have met a great couple and they've truly become such blessed friends. Their daughter is such a joy and it just warms my heart to see how happy and content J is with her.

Beginning on the wedding day, we started to get comments about when were we going to have babies... Crazy how people start that early huh? We get advice whether we want it or not on starting early or waiting and having kids later in life. We have come to realize how to turn off our hearing for this unwarranted advice and know that in so many ways we will never be completely ready. It's a life changing experience for many reasons. Since we're both family oriented we knew that we wanted kids earlier on in life... The question was just when.

We kept wondering when God wanted us to have kids and started worrying about this and that. My weird and worry wort worries were about adding a kid to the mix of moving. God used my mother in laws blog to speak to me. Her story is one in many ways similar to ours. The young couple decided for her to quit her job and her last day of work she found out she was pregnant with baby #1. It was a lot of finagling and concern about money but God never failed them, their needs and then some were always met. God is truly good and never failed to provide. This hit me hard and by the time I was done reading I had several tears rolling down my face. I kept wondering when would be the right time to have kids and wondered if it was before we left the navy, if it was during the academy or waiting till he was done with the academy or maybe when Joe's career was settled. Everything had its positives and negatives. Mama B's testimony just reminded me that God never failed and no matter having Him in control of the ride was the best place to be in...

I feel like the last year has aged me, but in a good way. I learned some lessons to never forget. God is in control. It's never easy to relinquish control or to assume the back seat. It's never easy to recognize that sometimes our own wishes and goals do not align themselves with God's will. But without a doubt, it is a path worth taking.

I can't wait to see where this path leads. Who knows where we'll be a year from now... Keep yourselves prepared! This family is on the move, and it may be one heck of a ride!

God is in control...A lesson in letting go. Part 1

Children raised in the church all hear one way or another that God is in control:

"He's got the whole world in His hand..."

They're rightly taught as we're raised that God has placed our parents in control of us on earth and that we need to listen and do as told.

Then they grow up. Many go to college and fight through feelings about what is right and wrong and comparing what their parents taught them to what they want to believe. Usually, they come to their new values, some right some wrong and continue onto their new life with these. Often times, as they grow up they tend to go back towards what their parents have told them (your parents are right after all! { :) } ). These now grown ups have to make their own life decisions based on these values and the goals they want to see in their life. And its never easy.

This is what I'm starting to learn recently. God has humbled me and through many different occasions has used a two by four (or larger) to teach me a hard lesson that I should have just known. But being the hard headed individual that I am, it took a lot for me to let it sync in with my will and my life.

Even before college I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to help people and wanted to help by talking people through problems. In college I got the degree that would help me get to this goal. Of course I wanted a family but I never knew when my knight in shining armor would come around, so it just naturally made sense to start on my own path. I never would have guessed that I had already met my knight and a week after I graduated with my double major in Psychology and Spanish that we would be getting married. I never would have placed myself (although it makes sense) as a military wife and understanding every acronym (or most) that comes my way. I also would never have guessed that my identity would get so caught up with being a navy wife. Commissary, TRICARE, NEX, deployments, rates, benefits, ships, commands, etc are part of my daily vocabulary. I knew I was going to be a navy wife before we got married. I became ok with it. I guess you could even say I became excited for it. For the mission that we may be able to do while being in the service.

Since being a navy wife was first and foremost for me, my job would come second. Since my husband's hours have never been stable and the times he is home is always precious, I needed a career that could work around it as much as possible. Going back to school could have been great but it was not in the budget. So I found a job as a nanny and eventually started my own career as an Arbonne rep.

8 months after marriage, January arrived and J deployed for 7 months. It was less than ideal but I knew we were both strong and would be fine. This deployment opened our eyes in many ways. We realized where our emphasis as a family laid and we knew that we never wanted to have a one parent household with the other one drifting in and out as the military pleased. We both love family and everything it stands for and this just wasn't for us. All of this came about in a single question I asked my dear husband one cross global phone call: "Do you like your job?". J had signed up for 6 years and we're now past the 5 year mark. We have 1 year to go and this is the crunch time where we either sign up again or we find a job.

So with all this back ground being said, this is where God has taught me so much. I know regardless of what the end result will be, these times will be so pivotal for me. I have learned more than ever, I am such a small being in God's huge world. And HE is in control.

Part 2 to follow...

Months down... About a month to go.

Best intentions hmmm. Yep I had the best intentions to begin my blogging debut big time while J was gone but did that happen? Well, just look back at the blogs and you can see that this didn't happen. Go me! HA.

The good news however is that we're down to a little more than a month left before the hubby comes back. I can NOT wait! I have this weird idea that even though I know he's not supposed to come back till August that he is just going to walk up the sidewalk any second now. I had this feeling this morning and even though I had just talked to him I still hoped that this was going to happen. My head knew the truth but my heart hoped otherwise.

This fall J will be in the navy for 5 years and only have one left. We're trying to see what our next step is since one door just got slammed shut. We know God has something out there for us but not sure if its within the navy or outside. It's not easy to start talking about this while he's gone and I can't wait for him to come home so we can really lay out the options and pray together.

Scary Things = Reminders that hubby is deployed

You know your Saturday isn't going to be good when you wake up to hearing your dog barfing in her kennel. As I went closer to investigate, I realized how sick my poor Charlie was... For those that haven't met Charlie, she's a one year old lab mix and is about the most hilarious active dog ever! She is always bouncing around and ready to attack your face with kisses. So when I opened her kennel door and had to coax her out instead of her usual racing out I knew even more something was wrong.

If these were the only symptoms then I wouldn't have been too worried, but along with her being extremely lethargic were two cases of explosive diarrhea of which one was red. Yeah no good. The vet didn't have an appointment, and I only had 5 hours until they closed. I was told to drop her off and they would look at her in between appointments. I know I'm going to be a worrisome mom, because this got me so scared!

Now, I'm just waiting for a third thing to happen, bad things come in threes right? At the same time of me dealing with a sick dog, I also was told that my grandma was in the hospital. She wasn't feeling well last night, and as a result my grandpa and grandma stayed up and at 2am, it sounds like she fainted off her chair. I am still waiting to hear about her test results. All prayers are highly appreciated... My grandparents are almost 90 and still live at home. Health issues are starting to become more and more debilitating and my need to move into an assisted living facility. I know it may sound silly, but I've always wanted my grandparents to meet my children, and although I've started to realized that they probably won't meet all of J and my future kiddos, I still dream of them meeting our first (no this is not a confession, no bun in my oven yet!).

Thankfully, Charlie is back home with me and laying at my feet. She hasn't eaten much but is drinking a little water. They couldn't figure out what was wrong with her but gave her some antibiotics, anti nausea and nutrition shots. She's doing better and I'm hoping to see my little spunky black kiddo when I see her in the morning!

These moments are moments where you realize maybe more than you had hoped to that your spouse was deployed. These were moments were I had realized that I was going to have to be strong without J. I didn't know when he was going to hear about Charlie, or how he was going to react, or when I was going to be able to speak to him... All I wanted to do was crumble and have him hold me and tell me it was going to be ok. So not easy.... People have told me time and time again, during deployment you realize how strong you really are. It is so true.

Home Sweet Home!

After two long weeks and a plane trip from hell I am home! It was wonderful to spend some great time in Montana with my family and enjoyed laughter, healing moments and sweet memories. It may take me some time, so bear with me but I look forward to share these with you in the hopes that they will make you laugh, smile or uplift your spirits.

I left with snow on the ground and showed up late last night so didn't get to see the weather here but when I woke up, I saw GREEN! Beautiful beautiful green grass and Spring!

Also folks, today is the first of April which means one more calendar turn towards the return of my husband! I can't wait!

Enjoy your first bite of April and laugh at those April Fools jokes!

Lawn mower? Mowing Lawns... UHHHH

In between my junior and senior year, I was able to travel to Honduras to visit my cousin and her little family. Holly met her husband Alex on an educational mission trip and he is the youth pastor of a church in Tegucigalpa. I was able to create it as a family trip but also as a missions trip.
ANYWHO
One of the things I was able to do while I was there was help translate with another mission trip group. This group was from my cousin's home church that helped support the church in Honduras. One of their church support practices is to introduce the mission group members to the church family so that they get a face to face interaction with the people they support. My cousin Holly had to organize these dinner get-togethers and arranged for there to be a translator with each group. They ended up needing me to be a translator. I hardly was able to eat because I had to listen to the English and the Spanish at the same time and be able to translate. I was able to manage just about everything
THEN
one of the young men tried to explain what he does for work during the summer. He mows the lawn. I'm sitting there trying to rack my brain for the word for mow, grass or just about anything that can help give a explanation or translation. My mind is going through any synonym or word that can explain. I'm thinking green, outside, summer, and then start making noises and demonstrating what exactly I'm talking about. I even stood up and made hand motions demonstrating that a lawn mower does this... Both cultures were very amused as I'm struggling to come up with the word...
Now I know exactly what it is so that it will never be nerve wracking and embarrassing again.
Cortar el césped

About US!

I happen to love these type of things... They get me hooked and heck while I'm loving on my fruit smoothie I will complete it! Recipe to follow... MMMMM and so healthy!


1. What are your middle names?
-- Christine and Christopher no joke!

2. How long have you been together?
--2 years in June.

3. How long did you know each other before you started dating?
--6 years

4. Who asked who out?
--He asked me out about 5 years ago but I turned him down. It just kind of clicked one phone call in June.

5. How old are each of you?
--I'm 21 and he's 24

6. Did you go to the same school?
--Nope

7. Are you from the same home town?
--Nope

8. Who is the smartest?
--We are smart in two different ways. J is incredibly smart in science and maths etc. I'm more of the english, languages, emotion smart!

9. Who majored in what?
--I was a psychology and spanish double major and J doesn't have his degree yet but he did a electrician apprenticeship

10. Who is the most sensitive?
--We both are, he hides it more.

11. Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
--Our pseudo honeymoon, we drove from Montana to Virginia.

12. Who has the worst temper?
--HMM... I think I have more little flairs but J has the bigger ones

13. How many children do you want?
--I love kids, keep them coming but we've agreed on 5 tops.

14. Who does the cooking?
--Mainly me!

15. Who is more social?
-- That one is so easy, I am.

16. Who is the neat freak?
--We're both fairly similar to where its not a huge deal but we do like to clean together

17. Who is the most stubborn?
--Ha! Both of us!

18. Who wakes up earlier?
--J typically but when he doesn't have to work then I definitely do.

19. Where was your first date?
--I'm trying to remember... Can't really recall... Maybe my Birthday dinner at Ferrano's. Oh the trials of a long distance relationship.

20. Who has the bigger family?
--J does, he's one of 6 siblings and all of them but one are married now!

21. Do you get flowers often?
--no, I told him that I wasn't crazy about cut flowers. Why? I don't know... I'm crazy sometimes. I do love them actually

22. How do you spend the holidays?
--We're trying to do one year with his family and one with mine. Last year he came to MT to meet my family and this next year we're going to be there again but we're going to see his family in the fall.

23. Who is more jealous?
--I think he is.

24. How long did it take to get serious?
--Immediately. I wrote in a journal less than one month later that I loved him and couldn't wait to be married to him.

25. Who eats more?
-- Very debatable.

26. What do you do for a living?
--I am a stay at home wife and work for a couple families as a mommy's helper.

27. Who does the laundry?
--Me.

28. Who's better with the computer?
--Me.

29. Who drives when you are together?
--He does

30. What is your song?
--We don't really have one. We danced to Feels Like Home by Chantal Kreviazuk for our first dance but we have such different musical tastes so he doesn't like to listen to it. HA!